we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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