I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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