ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You had me at "let me see your balls"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
