i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
