his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
