on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
