Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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