She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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