ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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