Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
