"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Randomize