im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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