Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
