I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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