Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
