Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
