After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize
