That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
two words...techno handjob
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
