He managed to light the Jello on fire...
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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