I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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