TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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