very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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