Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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