Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Randomize
