so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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