fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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