He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize
