I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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