if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
