it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
