we're chasing vodka with high fives
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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