stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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