My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I got chris browned last night
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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