"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
