You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
