Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
