do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It's shark week go big or go home
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
