Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize
