ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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