There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize