ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
