youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
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