I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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