I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Im part way to drunk.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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