If that was your dad, he is hot
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
