So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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