Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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