is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize