Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
did i walk over a car last night?
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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