I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
