Duck Duck Cougar?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
