Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
